365 days

365. Today is the 365th day of 2011. In just a few hours the clock will strike midnight we will all start the count over with a list filled with aspirations for the next 365 days. Like an addiction, an addiction of hope and promise that the next 365 will be better. That some how we as individuals will be better. One of the many lies we tell ourselfs. A miraculous change over night while we are gathered around people consuming amounts of alcohol. ” Next year i will be healthier, make smarter choice, be kinder, have more fun, live my life.” So much pressure put on 365 days and even if its a leap year we only get one extra. I feel sorry for that day. That one day every four years that is some how is supposed to make all the difference.

If were to write my list it would look something like this:

Find my signature scent. – Strong smells gives me headaches.
Exfoliate my face and body at least once a week. – Im way too lazy for this.
Wear SPF 30 every single day. – There aint enough sun in the uk.
Never, ever smoke a cigarette. – Until the next time I get drunk.
Only faux-glow from now on. – I love my white sheets too much.
Sleep on a satin pillowcase to protect my hair. – Doesnt go with the rest of my duvet set.
Not pick at any pimples I should (hopefully not) get. – This will probably last until my next date. Always wash off my makeup before bed. – Then one day ill come home drunk and ill forget and never do it again.
Find the perfect red lipstick because it will give me an extra dose of sassiness. - Id rather spend my money on alcohol.
Learn to apply my daytime makeup routine in 10 minutes or less. – I over sleep every day, I can do it in 5.
Throw out all of my expired makeup. - I wear so much make up in the weekends that it never actually has time to get old.
Clean my makeup brushes every week. – Like im ever gonna remember this.
Stop nibbling on my nails. – Then I get nervous.
Sleep 6-8 hours a night. – At least inbetween nights out.
Drink lots of water for a healthy body. - Specially between bottles of wine.
Take a multivitamin every day. - Two days in and this will be forgotten.
Have better posture. – Ie, dont take of heels after a night out and walk barfoot home.
Donate my time and/or money to a charity I am passionate about. – That charity being MOI.
Smile. -My teeth are lovely white pearls.
Tell myself that I am beautiful every. single. day. – Ill do this once, realize how stupid it makes me feel and never do it again.

Im not gonna write this list. I know it would be lying to myself and the same as I dont want start the new year with a hangover I dont want to start my new year, my new 365 days with lies and false hope. So insted im going to be honest with myself and say, im am most likely not going to fullfill any of the things on my list and insted of tricking myself in thinking that I am id rather just have one thing on my list, for my new years resolution I am going to be more honest with myself and just to make a point I am going to start my resolution today at the end of 2011. Because I dont need a fireworks to fool me into making a change. I can do that all on my own.